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“i don’t suppose i get my hundred dollars in advance,” victor asked mister green after the teenaged girl had purchased a couple of bagels and left.
“no, you couldn’t spend it in the other dimension anyway,” mister green replied.. “and if you don’t make it back - “ mister green smiled and spread his hands.
“what are the chances i won’t make it back?” victor asked.
“oh, there’s no real danger. about the same as if you delivered a pizza across town. if you delivered across to town, to bayview or someplace, you could get killed doing that. right?”
“i guess.”
“look, now that i got you, i will contact the other two operatives i got lined up for this job. they should be here in an hour or so. they will explain the setup to you.”
“all right. should i just wait here?”
“if you like. it looks like it’s clearing up outside, you can go sit in that little park, get some fresh air.”
victor took the hint. “all right, i’ll do that. these guys i am going with, they are experienced in this sort of thing?”
“actually, it is a couple of girls, not guys. cleo and joanie. they are both experienced, especially cleo. the basic gig is they are a couple of maids and you’ll be a butler. but they will give you the particulars.
“all right.” victor was a little disappointed by this. he did not care much for women, and he got his fill of them during the week, working with them and having one for his boss.
but he did not say anything to mister green, and he took his coffee and bagel and went outside to the little park mister green had indicated.
the rain had stopped. victor took a free newspaper out of a kiosk and dried off the seat of a park bench with it and sat down to wait for cleo and joanie.
after finishing his coffee and half the bagel, he took out his phone and began watching an episode of return to the planet of the dinosaurs.
*
cleo was dark and joanie was blonde, and they were both short and skinny and kind of mean looking. victor had never seen a maid - or a butler - except on television, and he supposed they looked the part. did maids on television ever have long legs and big hooters? maybe in porno but probably not on regular tv or real life.
cleo, seated beside him on the bench, was explaining something to him and he tried to pay attention. joanie was standing in front of him, blocking his view of the street and the deli.
“- we are on a cruise ship, a very exclusive cruise ship,” cleo was saying. four of the guests are in a suite, playing bridge.”
“bridge?” victor asked. was that something like charades?
“it’s a card game,” joanie said. “always played by four people.”
“right.” victor nodded. “um- do i have to know how to play?”
“no,” cleo told him. “the players will play, we are just the butler and the maids. listen up. the four players will be george soros, hillary clinton, angela merkel, and vladinir putin. you got that?”
victor had heard about george soros but did not know what he looked like. the name angela merkel sounded sort of familiar. with hillary clinton and putin he was on more solid ground.
“you look a little confused,” cleo said.
“are they really going to be these people?” victor asked.
they both laughed. “what a question!” said cleo, and ”what a rookie!” joanie added.
“i was just asking,” victor mumbled. “i’m new to this.”
“that’s o k,” cleo told him, in an almost friendly tone. “listen - this is all you have to know. when they are playing, you will go in - “
“we will tell you when, “ joanie said.
“and you will say to them,” cleo continued, “‘we have excellent vodka , if you would like some with your coffee.’ and then hillary clinton will say, “i had enough cheap vodka back in odessa.’”
“and you will say to her,” joanie said, “‘madam is pleased to be droll.’ that’s all you have to say. as soon as you say that, we will take over . think you can remember that?”
“you will recognize hillary clinton, right?” cleo asked.
“sure,”
“anyway, she will be the one saying. i had enough cheap vodka back in odessa.’.” said joanie.
"got it.” victor took his phone off his lap and starting punching it.”
“what are you doing?” cleo almost shouted.
“i am just getting all that down.”
“no, no, no - no cell phones,” cleo said. “there are no cell phones in this dimension. you will just have to remember what to say, all right?”
“i guess,” victor agreed.
“we will run through it a few more times,” said joanie. “so you should be o k.”
cleo stood up. “all right, let’s do it.”
8. on the high seas
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